by
Arestion
Picture by Jach'a Mallku
Kai
opened his eyes and stepped out of the cryopod. Something was
wrong, something was very wrong. His eyebrows knitted in an
unemotional frown as he looked around. There was no one else
in the cryochamber, not even 790. Although Kai didn’t feel
one way or the other about the amorous robothead, he did know
that 790 spent much of his time in the cryochamber while he
slept.
He stood a few seconds longer while he looked first to the left and then to the right, before he turned his body the same way and walked out of the chamber and made his way to the bridge. It was quiet. Not even the usual sounds the ship made could be heard. He walked resolutely in his sauntering way, his arms swaying.
The bridge was as empty and quiet as the rest of the
ship. The viewscreen showed the empty vastness of space. Kai
stopped, turned around and then stood with his head slightly
tilted to the side as if he was listening. He knew there was no
purpose in trying to ask Lexx where the others were or if
something had happened. Lexx wouldn’t answer. Lexx would
only respond to Stanley. He straightened and decided to have a
look in the galley. Of course no one was in the galley. They
weren’t in their bedchambers, the toilet or the shower
either.
Kai paused for a moment before walking to the mothbay.
Being an assassin meant being thorough. So he was being true to
his conditioning when he first made sure there was no one alive
on the ship before finding out whether someone had actually left.
There was a moth missing. But where could Xev and Stan
have gone? And why would they bring 790? The viewscreen had not
shown anything but a void, a region of space with almost nothing
in it at all.
Kai stood in the mothbay staring at the place the
missing moth should have been. As he saw it, he had two options.
He could either take a moth and fly around the Lexx to see if
there was anything to see. Or he could simply walk outside with
the same objective.
He decided a moth would be better. It would take him around the Lexx much faster than walking would. He climbed into one of the remaining moths and moments later it took off.
“Vaiyo a-o”, he sang to himself as he guided the moth through the innards of the ship.
Kai didn’t know why he sang. It just seemed appropriate somehow. He was alone. He may or may not be heading into battle, but he was certainly moving towards the unknown.
“Vaiyo a-o a home va-ya-ray”, he sang and then yanked back the joystick when the outer airlock failed to open.
He sat in the hovering moth looking at the airlock that for some reason remained closed. His stern face was totally unemotional as he turned the moth around and flew back to the bridge. His mouth had the slightest bit of stiffness to it as he bit his teeth together and pressed his lips down over them.
He left the moth beside the precipice and walked to the center of the bridge. He looked up and then extended his arm and let the brace fly upward. He had done it before and now he did it again. Slowly but steadily he made his way out to stand between Lexx’s huge eyes. He looked around with the traces of a scowl on his forehead.
There was nothing in front of the Lexx. There was nothing to either side. And there was nothing behind it.
Kai paused for a moment before he turned to walk to Lexx’s belly. He was just below the mouth when he saw it.
It was a smallish vessel. It looked almost, but not entirely, like a cone. It must be the place Stan, Xev and 790 had gone. The question was no longer where, but why. But Kai was dead and the dead are not curious. The dead don’t feel friendship, love or loss either. But yet there was something driving him to find out what had happened to the others, why they had left the ship and why Lexx appeared, if not dead, then at least sleeping.
The ship wasn’t far off. It had positioned itself very close under the belly. Kai looked at it and then, with a look of concentration, he let the brace fly again.
He pulled himself through the vacuum of space towards the smaller ship. He tried to look in through a porthole, but he couldn’t see anything. There was an airlock at the bottom of the cone and he used it to get onboard the ship. Just inside the moth stood abandoned.
Kai put his hand on the eye-hatch and looked inside. It was still abandoned. There was not much light in the small shuttlebay. But it was enough for him to see that no one was there.
Opposite the airlock was a hatch that probably opened to the rest of the ship. Kai opened it quietly and stuck his head through. There was a corridor on the other side. He followed it and popped his head through every hatch on the way. No one and nothing. So far this ship seemed as empty as the Lexx.
The last hatch left him standing on the bridge. A few lights blinked lazily, but other than that there was no lifesigns of any kind. He turned around circling the heel he had planted on the floor. This was very annoying and puzzling, except he was dead and didn’t get annoyed or puzzled, or did he? He frowned and turned once again the whole way around. This time he noticed another hatch to the side of the one he’d come through.
There was obviously more to this ship. Kai stepped through the hatch and found himself by a ladder. He looked at it for a while before descending to the next level. There was another hatch. He opened it. Inside was a brightly lit room. He started to step through, but halfway he stopped dead as the full view of the room hit him.
* * * * *
Stanley H Tweedle sat on the bridge. He was turning his hat over and over in his hands. He drew in a deep breath and filled his cheeks before letting the air out in a loud explosionlike exhale. Stanley H Tweedle was bored.
“Lexx!”
“Yes,
Stan.”
”How long now?”
“Seven hours, twentyfour minutes and twelve seconds, Stan.”
“And we have to go there?”
“Yes, Stan. I am getting hungry again. I need to eat.”
Stanley sighed again.
“Okay, okay.”
He held up his hands palms out in resignation.
“We’ll do it your way.”
“Thank you, Stanley.”
“Yeah, I’m a real nice guy.”
He looked around trying to think of something else to do, but he couldn’t think of anything. So he sighed yet again.
“Stan?”
“Yes, Lexx.”
“I am picking up a distresscall.”
“Where is it coming from?”
The viewscreen flickered and a small, conish vessel appeared.
“Lexx, let’s hear it.”
“As you wish, Stan.”
The viewscreen flickered again and instead of the coneshaped ship it showed a beautiful, blonde woman, who looked almost desperate.
“To anyone who can hear this”, she said with a note of panic in her voice. “My computer has crashed and I have no means of controlling my ship. I need immediate assistance. Please respond!”
“Okay, Lexx, open a channel to that ship.”
“As you command, Stan.”
“This is captain Stanley H Tweedle. How may we help you?”
He smiled reassuringly at the blonde, who suddenly had a look of hope on her face.
“Thank god”, she said with relief. “I’ve been drifting for ever.”
“You said something about a crashed computer?”
“Yes, the main frame must have burned out or something. And I don’t have the means to repair it by myself.”
“Well, miss …?”
“Deli.”
The woman smiled and lowered her eyes, then looked at Stanley again.
“I would be very … grateful”, she said and moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue.
“Oh, really”, Stanley said his smile getting bigger.
“Yes, very … very … grateful.”
She blinked her big, blue, innocent eyes a couple of times and Stanley swallowed.
“Do you …”, he started but had to stop when his voice broke.
He swallowed hard once more and cleared his throat.
“Do you know what you need?”
“Oh, yes”, she said with a seductive smile.
“I mean for your computer.”
“I’m not very good with computers.”
“Oh, hey, that’s okay.”
“Really?”
Her eyes grew very wide and even more innocent than they’d been before.
“Oh, yes, I’ve got just the thing you need.”
“You do?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful!”
“I’ll just go get it and I’ll come over to you. Okay?”
The blonde nodded. Her eyes showed longing and her moist lips were slightly parted.
“I’m bursting with anticipation”, she breathed.
Stanley stared at the viewscreen for a while after the image of Deli had been replaced by that of her spaceship. He could not believe his luck. He had to bring 790 of course. He sighed. He really hated that robothead.
He got up and put his hand on the controlpanel.
“Lexx.”
“Yes,
Stan.”
”Set course for that small ship.”
“You are my captain, Stan, and I will do what you ask. But then I will not be able to make it to the planet.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, Stanley, I am sure.”
“What if, when we get to the ship, you go to sleep. Would that help?”
“I don’t know.”
“But wouldn’t you preserve your energy that way?”
“Yes, I would, Stanley, but I still don’t know if I can make to that planet.”
“This is a matter of life and death, Lexx, we must all make sacrifices. Set a course for that ship.”
“As you wish, Stan.”
Stanley started down the passageway to the cryochamber but thought better of it and went to wake up Xev instead. Xev was better with 790 than he was, even though the robothead no longer was in love with her.
Xev was dreaming. She had a wonderful dream where Kai played a very prominent part. And then Stan woke her up. Just the fact that he woke her up put her in a foul mood. But he had woken her up from dreaming of Kai …
She hissed at him and turned over to go back to sleep and try to recapture the dream.
“Come on, Xev.”
Stanley shook her gently.
“We have an emergency.”
Xev rolled onto her back and looked at him with dawning interest in her eyes.
“What kind of emergency?”
Ha, got her, he thought.
“We picked up a distresscall.”
He started to leave and said over his shoulder:
“I’ll go get 790. Meet me in the mothbay.”
Xev would be in the mothbay when he got back. He knew that. She was far too curious to let this pass.
“What kind of distresscall?” she called after him.
But he didn’t answer. She laid back and tried to suppress the urge to kill Stan and eat his brain. She put her hands on the side of her head and moaned.
“It’s probably not much of a brain anyway”, she said to herself through clenched teeth.
She sat up. Stan had said he would get 790. He hadn’t said anything about Kai. But if he had picked up a distresscall, shouldn’t he be coming with them? She growled as she got to her feet and went down the passageway that led to the mothbay.
790 looked at Kai as he lay in the cryopod and sighed.
“If you could only be awake and here with me”, he moaned.
Then he started composing another poem in honour of his dead love.
“There you’re lying cold and dead
and I’m just a robothead
But I would surely feel like Venus
If I could only have your …”
“790”, Stanley said interrupting yet another of the robothead’s obscene poems.
790 broke off his declamation of undying love and snarled.
“What do you want?” he spat.
Stanley smiled. He knew 790 would protest and call him names, but in the end 790 was just a head and couldn’t do anything to stop him.
“I need your help.”
“You need help all right. I’m busy.”
790 turned his attention back to Kai.
“You are aware”, Stanley said with a hint of sarcasm, “that Kai can’t actually hear you?”
“Of course I am, you pitiful excuse for a man.”
Well that didn’t take long, Stanley thought a look of resignation on his face.
“Then you wouldn’t really have to be here, would you?”
“Are you daft?” 790 rolled his eyes. “Why do I ask? It’s obvious. Don’t you get it, security guard fourth class? I need to be here in case the deadolicious man in black decides to honour me with his presence.”
Stanley didn’t know why he even bothered trying to reason with this freak of nature. He didn’t stop to think that most of the people onboard and the ship itself were definitely freaks of something if not nature. He couldn’t waste any more time here.
“Well”, Stanley said with a note of finality in his voice, “I need you to do some work.”
He picked up the robothead and started to leave.
“Unhand me, you filth of filth!” 790 demanded in a shrill voice.
“No”, Stanley said and left the cryochamber.
“Kai, my beloved, wake up and save me from this the most unworthy of men.”
But Kai remained as he had been, frozen and unaware. And 790 had no choice but to sobbingly be carried to the mothbay by the man he hated the most.
Just as Stanley had expected Xev was waiting in the mothbay. He shouldn’t have any problems with this mission, but it was nice to have a cluster-lizard as backup anyway. He could tell that Xev wasn’t comfortable with the situation. She was standing outside one of the moths looking as if she wasn’t able to decide wether to climb inside or not.
She looked at the sobbing robothead. Not long ago, well in fact it was about 4.000 years, but it didn’t feel nearly that long, all 790’s attention had been on her. It felt very strange that that had suddenly changed and that the robothead was now in love with Kai. She felt a bit left out. She couldn’t get Kai’s attention, try though she might. And now she couldn’t even comfort herself with 790’s bad poetry and sultry glances. But they did have something in common. They were both in love with a dead assassin who could never return their feelings.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” she asked as Stanley approached.
She had a bad feeling about this whole situation.
“Why, Xev”, Stanley said with a crooked smile, “you’re usually the first person to want to investigate and be part of an adventure.”
She gave him a dark look.
“Yes, ordinarily”, she said quietly.
She watched Stanley put 790 in the moth and then climb in after him. But she still hesitated. There was a great deal he hadn’t told her about this.
“Coming?”, he asked.
She glanced at him.
“Maybe we should wake up Kai.”
“Why?” Stanley asked with just a hint of annoyance. “Don’t you think I can handle this?”
“Have you ever been able to handle anything?” 790 asked with heavy sarcasm.
He missed Kai and he could barely tolerate these two warmblooded individuals. Stanley scowled at him but he didn’t bother with any more insults. He had said what he wanted to say and now settled back in sulking silence.
Xev looked at Stan. She knew him well enough to know that when he was like this he wouldn’t listen to reason. He wouldn’t listen to anything. Reluctantly she climbed into the moth. There was something going on here that she didn’t understand. Stanley usually only got totally unreasonable on two occasions. One was if he had to do something that might get him killed, the other when he saw a prospect for sex.
She gave him a long sideway glance as he piloted the moth. Was he being coerced? No, it didn’t look that way. Maybe he had been taken over by something like when they hit the web? She couldn’t tell. Whatever it was it looked like he was doing it willingly, even eagerly.
“Lexx”, Stanley said as they left the ship.
“Yes, Stan.”
“You can go to sleep now. I’ll tell you when to wake up. Okay?”
“Okay, Stanley.”
“What’s going on, Stan?” Xev asked.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re not usually this secretive.”
She smiled winsomely.
“You can tell me.”
She put her hand on his arm and looked at him seductively.
“Er”, Stanley said confused, “uh … er … um.”
Then he cleared his throat. His voice still broke once when he started to speak.
“I suppose I could”, he said as he sat down the moth in the shuttlebay of the other ship.
There was no one to meet them. That was a bit strange. But maybe Deli was busy trying to repair the ship.
“I told you we got a distresscall.”
“Yes”, Xev said as she went after him with 790 in her arms.
“Well”, he said as he started down the corridor, “it was a distresscall, but it wasn’t really serious.”
“Not … serious”, Xev said with a sinking feeling.
“Well, it was, just not lifethreatening serious. If you know what I mean?”
They didn’t meet anyone as they made their way to the bridge. Why was he not surprised? Stanley Tweedle does it again, 790 snorted to himself.
“Hm”, Xev said and looked around the empty bridge.
She knew all too well what Stanley meant. With his sexdrive you could think it was him who had got the loveslave conditioning and not her. She wondered if he would ever stop thinking with his dick. At least she had an excuse for behaving the way she did.
Stanley frowned. If the main frame was damaged wouldn’t the bridge be the place to repair it from? Xev sighed and pouted. And then she saw it. She pointed to the other hatch and Stanley nodded. Yes, Deli must just have gone away from the bridge for a little while. Maybe she hadn’t even seen them coming.
“All right”, Xev said as they started down the ladder, “exactly what kind of emergency was it?”
Stanley opened the hatch at the foot of the ladder and looked back at her.
“Well, there was this girl …”
Xev could feel her stomach sinking through the floor. That was how it usually started with Stanley.
“… and she has a problem with the main frame computer.”
He turned and went through the hatch with Xev just behind. They entered a brightly lit room. It took a few seconds before what was in the room registered.
790 was getting bored and longed to be back with the delicously dead dude, when he suddenly realized what was going on.
“Tweedle!” he screeched. “What have you done?”
It was then he realized he’d been had. And the full horror of the room hit him as he looked around to see what was happening.
Deli was holding 790’s snarling head. She was still a gorgeous blonde, but all innocence and seductiveness was gone. She had a hard look in her eyes as she pointed some sort of weapon at him. At least he assumed it was a weapon and he was not eager to test that assumption.
Xev was being restrained by a very large man. She hissed and tried to writhe free, but the man was much stronger than her. She drew back her lips and let out an angry cluster-lizard scream. But she was still held in a firm grip.
“Hello, Stanley H Tweedle”, Deli said gloatingly when Xev fell silent.
“Hi … er … hi ... uh ... I take it you don’t need our help with the computer.”
“On the contrary.”
“But”, Stanley said confused, “why …?”
“I’m guessing this robothead can fix the computer. So we don’t really need you, do we?”
Deli put down 790 on the floor and came up to Stanley. She let the weapon trace down the side of his face, which made him break out in a sweat and swallow hard.
“So we can have some fun, can’t we?” she purred excitedly.
“What … what kind of fun did you have in mind?”
“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of spoiling it for you”, she said and grabbed at his groin.
“Umph!” he said surprised, his eyes widening.
He wasn’t sure whether or not he was supposed to enjoy it. If he was then she was grabbing him just a bit to hard.
“Come with me!” she said without letting go.
“Okay”, he breathed.
He hurried to follow with mincing steps. He did not feel like getting separated from that particular handful of him that she was hanging on to.
Deli led him to the inner wall. There were a lot of things hanging on that wall that he did not want to look at. She stopped beside a chain with cuffs at the end.
“Put them on”, she ordered.
“I’m not really into bondage.”
The grip on his vitals tightened.
“But I will try anything once.”
His voice got a bit high-pitched as he cuffed himself to the wall.
She leaned close to him and he turned his face away from her.
“I’ll be back”, she whispered in his ear.
Then she released his groin. He sighed with relief and cradled his bruised balls.
“Okay”, he whispered, “Okay”.
Then he looked after her.
“You don’t have to hurry on my account”, he muttered.
Xev was still trying to get free, but the man simply picked her off the floor and carried her to the the other side of the room. She was soon cuffed to the wall beside Stanley. Their captors picked up the protesting 790 and took him to a console near the hatch and hooked him in.
“Where is Kai when you need him?” Stanley muttered.
Xev looked at him with hostility.
“It was you who didn’t want him to come”, she hissed.
“Thank you for reminding me”, he sighed.
He glanced across the room to where Deli and her large friend were having obvious problems with getting 790 to cooperate.
“What do you think the’ll do to us?” he asked.
“Look around”, Xev said. “This place is worse than the bodypart remover on the Cluster. It’s not much that can be contemplated that they can’t do.”
Stanley shuddered.
“That’s what I was afraid of.”
“What I don’t understand is why they would capture us before we helped them:”
“There are probably things in the computer that would give them away. 790 would’ve known almost immediately.”
“So what kind of people fly around in a ship with a torturechamber?”
“Depraved people, Xev, very depraved people.”
“So what do we do?”
“I don’t know.”
“Can’t Lexx eat this vessel like he did with the one in the light universe?”
“No, I told Lexx to go to sleep.”
Stanley chewed on the inside of his cheek. He had really screwed up this time. Lexx was sleeping and Kai was still in cryostasis. And all this was his fault. He had put them in a position that would probably get them killed, and in a very painful way too by the look of this room. He tried very hard not to look at all the instruments of pain that were displayed around him. He had been in a lot of difficult positions before and had somehow always come out of it, usually with the help of Kai or Xev. But this one he could see no happy ending for. This was it. After today there would be no Stanley H Tweedle, and no Xev either.
On the other side of the room their captors had somehow managed to get 790 to cooperate. Stanley had no idea how they could possibly have managed that. 790 had a mind of his own and the only one who seemed to be able to change it was Kai. Now they turned their attention to where he and Xev stood chained to the wall. Slowly they started walking towards them. Deli had a look of breathless anticipation, while her giant was as blank as he had been all along. It was something very menacing about the way they looked. It was obvious that they enjoyed the things they were going to do.
The giant stopped a few paces behind Deli, who came all the way up to them.
“Well”, she said looking from Stanley to Xev and back again, “I’m having difficulty deciding what to do. It’s been a long time since I had company and there are so many wonderful things you can do.”
“Why are you doing this?” Stanley asked.
“Because I can, and because I want to.”
She leaned closer and smiled a wicked smiled.
“I am very good with pain, others preferably.”
She looked from one to the other again and pouted.
“Decisions, decisions.”
Then she began quoting an old nursery rhyme and let her hand move between Stanley and Xev as she recited.
“App lapp said that you are dead.”
The hand stopped at Stanley who stared at it as though it was the hand of fate.
“I think”, Deli said, “I will save you for later.”
She pointed to Xev.
“Bring her.”
* * * * *
Kai took in the scene with one glance around the room. 790 was hooked up to the ships computer. Xev was chained to a rack. Stanley was fettered face in to a large tube, he was naked, his red overall pulled down to lie around his ankles. A blonde woman was standing on his left and a very big man stood very close behind him. Stanley was pleading with his torturers, but that only excited them more.
The woman was holding a cat-o’-nine-tails, which she stroked almost lovingly. She had obviously been using it on Stanley before the large man had taken over. When the hatch opened she turned to face it, and smiled.
“Welcome”, she said.
She started moving towards Kai. Stanley managed to look over his shoulder.
“Kai! Thank god you’re here!”
The woman laughed.
“It looks like we have another volunteer. Perhaps you would like to try the iron maiden?”
Kai stepped the whole way through. He looked around again. The levers on the rack had been pulled, but Xev didn’t seem to be harmed. The giant did not let the new arrival interrupt him.
“Kai, my love”, 790 called, “save me from this fate worse than death.”
Kai stopped and let the woman come to him. She walked around him with a look of desire in her eyes.
“I do not know what the iron maiden is”, Kai said.
“Really?” she purred, “Why don’t you let me show you?”
She took his hand and led him to the right wall. There stood a figure of a woman made of metal.
“This is the iron maiden.”
“I see.”, Kai said, “A maid made from iron.”
“That’s right.”
“What is its’ purpose?”
“To give me pleasure.”
“How does it give you pleasure?”
“Like this”, she said and opened up the maiden. “Now you stand in there.”
Kai stepped in.
It was made to host one person and to keep that person more or less immobile. The maiden was standing on a grid, where dried blood could be seen. The lid had several very sharp spikes in it.
“And now”, she said with a look boardering on ecstatic, “I close it.”
With a rapturous sigh she pushed the spikes in the lid into Kai’s body. Then her look turned to disappointment. She opened the lid and glared at him.
“You are supposed to scream, bleed and die, in that order.”
“I am dead”, Kai said. “And though I may someday cease to function, you can not kill me.”
As an afterthought he added:
“And the dead do not scream or bleed.”
|
The woman tried to slam the lid shut again, but Kai put his hand in between and pushed it open. He stepped out and the holes the spikes had made closed themselves.
“I will not let you destroy my fun”, the woman said furiously.
“I fail to see what is fun about a torturechamber.”
“Yes, you would.”
“Let them go”, Kai demanded.
“No.”
“If you do not, I will have to kill you.”
“You can try”, she said and pulled out the weapon she had threatened Stanley with.
She fired it, but Kai stood uneffected. A look of consternation flew across her face, followed by one of dawning desperation.
“Stark!” she called.
The giant stepped away from Stanley and turned to face Deli.
“Stark, get him and tear him to pieces.”
Kai moved away from the big man. He went over to the rack and started to undo Xev’s restraints.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
“Yes”, Xev said with a little sigh, “this machine wasn’t strong enough to hurt me.”
When Stark was almost there Kai moved to the other side and kept working.
“So she eventually got bored with trying and got to work on Stan instead.”
Stark followed him, but when he got close Kai moved again.
“Come on, Stark!” the woman shouted. “How hard can it be to catch one dead man?”
Stark didn’t reply, and although Kai wasn’t really moving very fast, Stark was slower. This gave Kai time to release Xev.
“Do I have to do everything myself?”
The blondes face was twisted into an angry mask and she moved to intercept Kai, who still stayed just ahead of the giant.
“No”, Xev said and rolled off the rack, “you don’t.”
Her fist met Deli’s face with a thud.
“There’s more where that came from.”
It was more of a promise than a threat. Deli had stopped and put a hand to her hurting face. She now looked at Xev.
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” she said through the hand.
“Like what?”
“I still have the gun.”
Xev looked at the weapon with narrowing eyes.
“Not for long”, she said quietly.
She went for the gun at the same time Deli raised it to fire at her. The shot just missed the tube, where Stanley still sprawled.
“Hey”, he called, “be careful where you point that thing, all right!”
Xev and Deli struggled for the gun. Then it went off again and the two women stopped and stared at each other. Then Deli’s eyes glazed over and she slid to the floor.
Xev grabbed the weapon and went to unchain Stanley.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you”, he mumbled.
“Are you all right?” she asked.
“Am I …?”
He stared at her with a look in his eyes asking where she’d been.
“Of course I’m not all right.”
“Oh”, Xev said.
She saw his hat on the floor beside the tube and bent down to get it. Then she placed it on his head and patted his cheek.
“Better?” she asked.
“Yes. Thank you. Just give me a minute.”
“We don’t have a minute right now.”
Stark had finally caught up with Kai. Kai was wordlessly fighting him while Stark just as wordlessly tried to tear him limb from limb and succeeded in doing so.
“Aaah!” 790 screamed when he saw what was happening.
Xev picked up Kai’s right arm and aimed it at Stark.
“Kai”, she called, “use the brace.”
Stark was silently removing Kai’s head from his torso when the brace severed his. It flew in an arc and hit the side of the rack with a sickening sound.
“Thank you”, Kai said.
His headless and armless body sat on the floor. Xev reattached his arms and passed him his head, which he then pressed onto his shoulders. Stanley had put on his overall again. He looked around in disgust.
“What do you say about getting out of here?”
“Sounds good”, Xev said with a little smile.
Kai unhooked 790 from the ships computer.
“Oh, thank you, my dead, dark darling”, the robothead said ecstaticly.
“Shall we go?” Kai asked as he put 790 in the hook of his arm.
“This is true bliss”, 790 said his eyes turning to a couple of hearts. “To be lying in the arms of my beloved.”
“790”, Kai said with a hint of strain around his eyes, “off!”
The robothead turned himself off and they all left the torturechamber to make their way back to the shuttlebay. They got in to the moth and left the ship with a feeling of relief. Stanley turned on the intercom.
“Lexx, wake up!”
Xev piloted the moth towards an airlock.
“Lexx”, Stan said a little impatient, “are you awake?”
“Yes, Stan.”
“Good. After we’ve entered the airlock you have my permission to eat that ship and resume course for the planet.”
“Thank you, Stanley.”
Lexx was silent for a few moments.
“Stan?”
“Yes, Lexx.”
“The ship won’t make me sick to my stomach, will it?”
“No, Lexx.”
“Then I will eat it.”
They flew the moth straight to the bridge, while Lexx ate the horrible little ship and started moving towards the planet again.
“How do you feel, Lexx?” Stanley asked when they were all back on the bridge.
“I am hungry, Stan. It wasn’t much of a snack.”
“I know that”, Stanley said patiently. “Will you be able to make it to that planet?”
“I don’t know. I think so.”
“Good, Lexx, that’s very good.”
Stanley looked at Xev, who was giving him one of her I-told-you-so looks. He looked away and found Kai also staring at him.
“Okay”, he said. “Okay. It was my fault. And yes, we should’ve woken Kai.”
“Yes”, Xev said and turned to watch the viewscreen.
But Kai was still looking at him.
“What is it, Kai?” Stanley asked.
“I was thinking about the tube you were chained to. I do not know what it is used for.”
Stanley blushed furiously and looked away.
“I don’t wanna talk about it”, he said. “In fact, I never wanna hear anything about that ever again.”