(aka The Virginity 'FAQ') Version 1.03 Oct. 28, 1994 by: Derek J. Wojciech bz754@cleveland.Freenet.Edu dwojciec@mason1.gmu.eduThis document is Copyright (c) 1994, by Derek J. Wojciech. It is intended for public use, and may be redistributed freely in its original form.
The purpose of this 'FAQ' (Frequently Asked Questions) was to group together various questions/comments/experiences on the benefits of virginity (ie abstinence until marriage.) I felt there was a need to express and record the many virtues of this lifestyle, and make some type of document widely available to those seeking answers, advice, guidance and encouragement. I hope those reading this 'FAQ' will seriously consider all the consequences and responsibilities ** both good :-) and bad :-( ** relating to relationships and sexual conduct.
Currently most of the Questions/Answers in this 'FAQ' are indirect translations of discussions on the subject matter as held on ISCABBS. All the arguments / recommendations presented in the Answer sections reflect my own opinion (unless otherwise noted.) I may tend to have a 'first person male' viewpoint in some discussions. This document has a 'loose' feel to it as it attempts to echo casual conversation.
Please leave all discussion/disagreements of subjective material to a public forum such as Usenet or a BBS.
I'm a virgin, and waiting to share that special gift of human sexuality with that one person I will commit the rest of my life to in marriage (when and if :) A strong foundational supports of a marriage is intended to be the exclusive physical/emotional bond of sexual union. One of the most beautiful ways I think of saving myself for my future wife is looking at it this way: I'm going to love her soooo much that right now, as I go through life (even though I don't know for sure who it is I may marry :) I am saving this GIFT. And I want to give this gift only to her, a one of a kind, the most precious person I will ever meet. And she deserves it. That gift I will have hopefully kept to show her that she is something really, really special. And you know what, I know she will appreciate that with her whole heart. In today's society it's a rare and unique person who wishes to save that gift of sexual union for his/her lifetime marriage partner. I would encourage anyone questioning, feeling the peer pressure, the societal pressure, the boyfriend/girlfriend pressure, to wait until you both enter that lifetime covenant with each other. What could be more exciting, more special, more emotional than sharing the wonders of sex with your one true and dedicated love!?! Think about it. Think about the future. Think about your future wife or husband. Don't they deserve your absolute best? It's something that you will remember forever, and what better way to experience it than in a relationship lasting a lifetime. :)
Two inter-related questions, dealing with 'losing it.' Uggh. What a horrible term. 'Losing it.' Often popular culture today says 'Go for it, lose your virginity, you're not a man until you do.' 'Make that conquest.' That's what it is generally held up to be in today's society. A conquest. A hurdle. Uggh. How many women here would like to volunteer to be a simple obstacle? I know I'm simplifying things, but anyone with such an attitude and wanting to / did take advantage of some young lady, in the name of conquest, how utterly lame can you get???
Anyway back to the subject. I look at virginity as a gift, to be honorably saved for that one person you decide to spend your lifetime with (ie marriage partner.) The greatest emotional / physical treasure a person can give. You don't take it. You don't lose it. You give it. Isn't that what true love is about? So how does one prepare oneself? By making that commitment. Realizing she is sooooooo special that she deserves your all. That's your total love, dedication, commitment. Not cheapened, but in a lifetime covenant. Under this context what's the reason for being nervous? Should sharing sex with your husband or wife make you nervous? (of course there's slight nervousness in all new things, but in marriage there is that security of freedom in commitment where a couple can share their unbridled love as it is the ALL of relationships. :)
Now of course we look at stuff that would make anyone nervous in a premarital sexual encounter. You've heard it all. Pregnancy, AIDs, STDs, broken relationships, guilt, hurt partners etc...
Intimacy. Someone to talk to. To care for. To be close to. A person who gives generously. A person who receives generously. It's the assurance that you can turn to another; whenever, wherever, and for whatever reason. But does sex create intimacy? No. Sexual activity can inspire a 'sense' of intimacy during it's duration. But this 'sense' fades quite quickly when there is no substance to back it up.
Intimacy develops with openness. Communication. Truly revealing your innermost thoughts and desires to another. This means laying your emotions on the line; becoming vulnerable. Increasing physical involvement to gain intimacy just doesn't cut it. 'People who discover this often fail to recognize what is happening, and instead of giving up the futile search for intimacy in bed, they intensify it. Time after time they achieve a type of closeness, and then watch it quickly fade. If this cycle is not broken, they will become numb to the idea of finding true intimacy. They settle for the cheap substitute.' #5 The emotional and psychological bond necessary for intimacy can only be found in the sharing of time, thoughts, and emotions with one another. In a completely open and transparent framework. This then sets up the relationship for emotional expression through physical means. We all want a successful relationship. Where does sex fit in? An article in 'Psychology Today' noted that sex was 'far down the list of reasons for a happy marriage.' #6 Less than 10% of the individuals with successful marriages thought good sexual relationships were important in keeping their marriage together. Research data revealed, in this study of some 300 couples married more than fifteen years, that sex is not the key to a happy, fulfilled marriage. #6
What is the key? The top two reasons given by both sexes as to why their marriage kept going were the same: #6
Girl(or guy): (possible responses) #5
Resulting psychological impact can be assumed about a sexual encounter because sex is a choice. And when a choice is involved, so is mind, will and emotion. It's the nature of humanity. When we choose, we always ask why, and weigh the consequences. And in a consensual act such as sex there are two involved. Just by telling her/him you want to have sex is a choice. You are already affecting another person's mind, will and emotions. Now you may have an argument for sex between animals, for theirs is strictly instinct. We choose why we have sex. Whether to give to a person, or take from them. Whether to please them, or please ourselves. Or somewhere in between. If you had no choice in the matter, then it has no psychological content. But you do. You and your partner feel pleasure, pain, love, hate, anxiety, indifference etc. And 'baggage' always results. It can be good feelings. It can be bad feelings. Because you remember what happened. No longer is the physical there, but the memory remains to be dwelt upon by your mind, will and emotions.
"True sexual freedom provides the option of saying no to these consequences [of sexual relations.] It says, 'We are human beings with procreative powers capable of mature love and rational choice. Our free will provides us with self-control and self-respect.'" #8
These phrases are based on a ideological framework. However, not necessarily religious, or it may co-exist as a rational and logical framework with moral principles. But doesn't there exist that which is generally known as 'natural law?' Or a moral code by which human beings follow? Of course a person of a particular belief system may refer to the author of this moral code as God, or the goddess, or whatever. So do you agree to the existence of at least a general 'moral' norm? One that describes what 'is meant to be?' Is racism 'meant to be' acceptable, or not acceptable? What prevents me from making my own 'relative' moral code, and say that I can be and act racist? By what basis are you telling me I am 'wrong.' Or why should I not lie to you, or steal from you? If morality is always relative to the individual, then I should be able to do these things without guilt, shame, or remorse. So there exist 'good and proper' conducts; there exist things 'meant to be.' And this directly applies to relationships. Should not trust, honesty, and fidelity all be fundamentals in a relationship? And when one of the aforementioned qualities is betrayed, cannot we accuse the perpetrator of wrongdoing?
As for sex being 'meant to be given in marriage.' Marriage, by definition, is an institution. So there are inherent characteristics to this institution; what is allowed, what is desired, what is meant to be etc. that emerge from the nature of the lifetime covenant. Love, sharing, dedication, giving, monogamy, and fidelity are just a few examples. A line between 'right and wrong' can be drawn based on these innate aspects.
I personally believe sex is inherently good! But inherently good sex is debased when used in an improper context. Are you saying love is not more noble and essential in a relationship than sex????? The fascinating mystery of love. Where a man and woman come together in affection, giving and receiving. To become one; in mind, body and spirit. That queesy feeling you get when you are near to your loved one. That cloud nine bliss. You compare that to a simply physical action? Sex, minus any emotion or feeling (which is impossible; but commonly masked off as prostitution) is on a level with love? Come on. I doubt anyone here would equate those two things. And sex (or what is typically thought of as sex between two persons) is a desire. No one needs sex.
Thanks for making a few great points. I don't know why people would be ashamed of something traditionally held in high esteem? But society has made some about-face turns regarding moral norms in the last few decades. It's interesting to hear you say that females are more reluctant than guys to have sex with a promiscuous person. I'm not sure what that statistic says but why should a man's virginity/non-virginity have greater/lesser value than that of a woman's?????
I'm glad you met a young woman who had strong beliefs and stood by her convictions. Do they lust? Of course, I would say we all do. That does not mean one wishes to continue in lustful thoughts. And the huge error comes when one acts upon wrongful desires. And I hold in high esteem a young lady (or man) who would 'refuse' sex based on beliefs, evidences and possible consequences.
Excellent point. If you are acting contrary to their beliefs, you don't respect them and you are taking advantage of them. Can we say 'rape', both emotionally and physically.
Ugggghhhn. It just tears me up inside to think of a newly married couple, where one or the other is not a virgin, and one saying or thinking...
Physically no. Memories also remain. But I believe in what I call 'neo-virginity.' It's the mental change, the redirection of the heart of a person in vowing to live a life of abstinence until marriage. I don't believe in holding a person's past against them. But they are accountable for the present.
She walks with class and she walks with style She's only sixteen years old Turns the head of every boy in school Their hearts have been bought and sold Popularity is hers for a price Sometimes the price is hard to pay Doin the things it takes to please the crowd Knowing all the right things to say Angela, such a pretty girl lost to the world Angela, you're naive, young, tell me where does your heart belong Angela... The social games have really gone too far Mama just can't understand High fasion girl has got a standard to meet Ego has the upper hand In her heart she's walked the way many times Maybe she just don't understand It's a matter of the heart, not the show And freedom is her heart's demand When you want to make a change, and feel it in your life You know your heart will have to rearrange..."Angela" by Legend
Another excellent point. Think of how degrading it would be to be in the above situation? How can sex be a 'gauge' pointing to the level of commitment? How can one say that a guy/girl cares about you more (due to your sexual relations) than the person they had sex with before? If they were having sex 'just for fun,' why not then would they be having sex with you 'just for fun?' Or how about a person thinking of the time they had sex before, and making comparisons? Oh it may not be intentional, but its an after the fact fact. Sex is a powerful and memorable emotional experience. What if they felt their previous partner was 'better' in bed??? Could that affect your current relationship????
Not know what to do??? Seems pretty evident that the methods involved in a man and women becoming physically intimate is quite innate to the human species. :)
Regarding the 'sexually incompatible' myth. It does not exist for a couple who has the proper priorities in a relationship. If you are in love with a person should a presumed sexual inconvenience ruin that love??? Here's the example I like to give. Suppose after two years of marriage, and wonderful sex, your loved one (a man) loses his genitals in a freak accident. So are you saying that would be grounds to ditch the guy??? That situation sounds pretty sexually incompatible to me. But there are no possible arguments that a fulfilling and wonderful relationship could not and should not continue. Note that I'm not saying every couple will have a 'perfect' sex life in marriage. But with openness, communication, and sharing the couple can enjoy a totally gratifying and enjoyable sexual relationship. :)
How do we 'gauge' compatibility? Isn't there always going to be someone who is a little 'prettier', a little 'sexier', a little better kisser according to some opinions? Such a pursuit theoretically can never end. Your current sexual partner is always 2nd, or 5th, 25th, or nth best. Such an outlook could be taken to physical appearance. A woman walks by who is prettier, so you dump your current partner because this new female's 'looks' are more compatible with your desires. This is an extreme example of what such viewpoints could imply. The incompatibility problem doesn't even exist when one has only one sexual partner, as comparisons cannot be made. I definitely think that 'attraction' and 'compatibility' are concerns, but they should be relegated to a proper priority. The concept of 'better sexual compatibility' undermines what true love and lasting relationships are all about.
Can you name any significant percentage of persons (excluding problematic circumstances) who do not enjoy sexual fulfillment? I think most everyone looks forward to this expression of love.
A good relationship exhibits growth. Exploring the different facets of each other's personality and character. Building trust. Gaining intimacy. Sexual fulfillment is just a part of a couple's sharing. A husband and wife have attained the degree of intimacy and commitment where they then can now express their love sexually. In openess. In assurance. In confidence. In security. Without fear. Without shame. What better way to discover and explore this wonderful territory than starting off together! Dedicated fully to helping, pleasing, and serving each other in the exclusive lifetime commitment of marriage.
Ok. Try before you buy. Taking this position then you are saying that a main priority in your decision to accept a woman in a relationship is sexual. So if she doesn't live up to your expectations then you dump her? Would any females reading this go for the above? That a male would judge you and accept or reject you based on your sexual prowess, or how you rate against the sexual ability of other women? Extremely shallow.
What about comparison? How do you judge a woman as to her sexual capability? If this is the only woman you ever had sex with, and the experience was quite fulfilling, then how could you honestly judge that she is not 'good enough.' You can't because there is no one else to compare with. Unless you have had previous sexual partners. Then you can 'rate' her performance in bed...'..I give this one a 6.7...'...*uggghhhhh*... Also 'try before you buy'-> remember STDs, pregnancy, consequences etc.
Babe, you whisper in my ear Things I shouldn't hear Oh girl, this time you've gone too far It's like a falling star You're givin' yourself away Too much a price to pay Girl, temptation's all around Our love has fallen down Oh, baby, the passions of design Our love is on the line Affections have been misplaced The scars we cannot erase Lies in the dark Words of love but they're tearing us apart Lies in the dark Baby, it's true"Lies in the Dark" by Bloodgood
There's only one safe way to remain healthy in the midst of a sexual revolution. It is to abstain from intercourse until marriage, and then wed and be faithful to an uninfected partner. It is a concept that was widely endorsed in society until the 1960s (and look what's happened since then..........)
Use of condoms has typically failed at least 15.7% of the time annually in preventing pregnancy. #17 They fail 36.3% of the time annually in preventing pregnancy among young, unmarried minority women. #17 In a study of homosexual men, the British Medical Journal reported the failure rate due to slippage and breakage to be 26%. #18 Remember a woman can conceive only a few days per month. Think of how much more risk is involved with a disease that can be transmitted 365 days a year.
At the National Conference on HIV in 1991 some 800 sexologists were asked to raise their hand if they would trust a condom to protect them during intercourse with a known HIV-infected person. Not one of them did. #19
Darn good question!!! We've already shown the stats on disease and pregnancy. Since 1970 the federal government has spent nearly $3 billion to promote contraception and 'safe sex.' This year alone, $450 million of your tax dollars will go down that drain. #20 (Compared to less than $8 million for abstinence programs.) After 22 years and nearly $3 billion, some 58% of teenage girls under 18 still did not use contraception during their first intercourse. #21 Furthermore, teenagers tend to keep having unprotected intercourse for a full year, on average, before starting any kind of contraception. #22
"Advocates of condom distribution say that kids are going to have sex, that try as we might we can't stop them. Therefore they need protection. Hence, condoms. Well, hold on a minute. Just whose notion is it that 'kids are going to do it anyway, you can't stop them?' Why limit the application of that brilliant logic to sexual activity? Let's just admit that kids are going to do drugs and distribute safe, untainted drugs every morning in homeroom. Kids are going to smoke, too, we can't stop them, so let's provide packs of low-tar cigarettes to the students for their after-sex smoke. Kids are going to get guns and shoot them, you can't stop them, so let's make sure that teachers have bulletproof vests. I mean, come on! If we are really concerned about safe sex, why stop at condoms? Let's convert study halls to Safe Sex Centers where students can go to to actually have sex on nice double beds with clean sheets under the watchful and approving eye of the school nurse, who will be on hand to demonstrate, along with the principal, just how to use a condom. Or even better: If kids are going to have sex, let's put disease-free hookers in these Safe Sex Centers. Hey, if safe sex is the objective, why compromise our standards?"
"Well, here's what's wrong. There have always been consequences to having sex. Always. Now, however, some of these consequences are severe: debilitating venereal diseases and AIDS. You can now die from having sex. It is that simple. If you look, the vast majority of adults in America have made adjustments in their sexual behavior in order to protect themselves from some of the dire consequences floating around out there. For the most part, the sexual revolution of the sixties is over, a miserable failure. Free love and rampant one-night stands are tougher to come by because people are aware of the risks. In short, we have modified our behavior. Now, would someone tell me what is so difficult about sharing this knowledge and experience with kids? The same stakes are involved. Isn't that our responsibility, for crying out loud, to teach them what's best for them? If we adults aren't responding to these new dangers by having condom-protected sex anytime, anywhere, why should such folly be taught to our kids?"
"Doesn't it make sense to be honest with kids and tell them the best thing they can do to avoid AIDS or any of the other undesirable consequences is to abstain from sexual intercourse? It is the best way - in fact, is it the only surefire way - to guard against sexual transmission of AIDS, pregnancy, and venereal diseases. What's so terrible about saying so?"
('The Epitome of Morality and Virtue' aka Rush Limbaugh) #23Well statistics point to the fact that things/accidents happen. But you know full well that every time you have sex there is risk/possible consequences involved. And is a few hours of pleasure worth a lifetime of pain, or even death??????
Even if (and that's a huge if; real-life statistics show otherwise) all contraceptives worked 99% of the time, would you take that chance of getting your partner pregnant, becoming a father, and be willing to accept all the emotional, physical, financial, social and mental responsibilities with it?
EDITOR'S NOTE - The following section is comprised of various quotes from anonymous persons, your peers. Most of them are network/BBS users. They share their thoughts and views regarding human sexuality and relationships. I believe this part of the 'FAQ' to be the most powerful. :) Real people. Real experiences. Real life. I would gladly include any personal testimonies, or related opinions or experiences from anyone wishing to contribute. (as space permits.) Again a great thanks to all those who have shared! :)
"Not the way I see it...my own opinion, mind you, but whatever woman eventually
shares my sex life is going to know that it means more than just making each
other feel good..."
"...the term "making love" should actually be that...an extension of the total
commitment that two people have for each other...that the physical act is an
extra in a relationship...not that the relationship exists because of it."
"...sex is a huge way to let your mate know that she (or he) is the most
special person in the world to you...it involves vulnerability that cannot be
found in any other way..."
"I guess for me that's just my opinion on women. My morals are just not to have
sex until I'm married-- I just want to save it and have it be something all the
more wonderful and special with my future wife. But in my experiences with
dating that I've had, it's made it much easier and better starting off as
wonderful friends and then starting a relationship-- this way once you break up
(if) then you can still relate to each other and go back to the time when the
relationship wasn't so physical and be friends again..."
"Physical attraction, per se, is not something I see as either right or wrong.
When it leads to mutually desired sex between partners in Matrimony, it's used
appropriately. When it leads to any other use of sex, it isn't. As I
understand things. Physical desire is like any other appetite. Morally
neutral, it can lead to either appropriate fulfillment, or not."
"...about the virginity thing...it is something special, and one should be
careful when giving it to someone, and I agree, it should be left for
marriage..."
"I have to agree with you about the losing thing, I hope to some day, "give"
my virginity to my husband...religion is not the only reason to abstain from
sex...but it is not a bad reason, to those who feel that way...I chose to weigh
the options, and decided to stay a virgin, it is important to me..."
"Sex is much more than just a physical act. It takes into account our
emotional, mental, and spiritual states as well as our physical state. If any
one of those states are upset, then the sex act may not be what we would like."
"...Religion is not the only reason to abstain until marriage. I'm religious,
Catholic as a matter of fact, but I didn't make the decision to abstain until
marriage because the Church told me to. I made the decision because I know
that I don't want to have to deal with the prospect of pregnancy, STD's, and
the other complications that go along with having a sexual relationship,
however fulfilling it may be. I want to know that the person I am involved
with is there because of who I am, not what I do in bed. I have seen too many
relationships dissolve because the only communication between the two people
involved was sexual. I want to have something different. So before you go
deciding that those who remain virgins are doing so because God told them to,
please give some credit to the fact we are logical human beings and made some
choices for our own well-being..."
"...one point that I always make is that with abstinence before marriage, they
won't constantly have to worry about whether the birth control will work or if
a pregnancy will result. Abstinence takes away this constant worry. I ALWAYS
worried about getting pregnant, and every other girl I know is like that too.
And the guys I know are concerned about it too. With abstinence, there is the
peace of mind for a female, that they don't have to worry about
pregnancy/disease and all the things that go along with those end results;
like...diapers, childcare, pre-natal care, who the father might be, whether he
will want to take responsibility, etc... and that right there is enough reason
for me to remain abstinent until marriage. :) Those are not fun things to go
through. And in today's society, when someone has sex, they are not sleeping
just with their partner, but everyone else that person has slept with too..."
"And it is NOT just up to the individual, for one reason simply because so many
people think it isn't! I don't care much what kind of sex life someone has, but
I do care about how someone affects someone else's sex life! Like I don't want
any person to ever have sex with a potential girlfriend of mine."
"...you only have one first time, if you aren't ready, one or both of you may
end up regretting it afterwards. Believe me, there is nothing wrong
with waiting..."
"...There are so many factors regarding sex that you only find out later, and
once you've done it, you can never not have done it. I lost my virginity when
I was 17, and sex became something it never should...College relationships are
so volatile. There is so much else going on, and sex, while it can be bonding
and meaningful, can tend to sexualize your relationship. By this I mean that
you will always have that nagging anxiety regarding pregnancy, and believe me,
waiting for 3 weeks or a month for a late period strains the best of
relationships. You then have to approach the safety factor...pregnancy is a
big deal. But the most important is afterwards. Chances are, no matter how
you feel now, you won't get married. Once you have sex, it's easier to have it
again, and in each relationship, it's earlier and earlier. How will you feel
if you break up, and terrible things are said? She'll probably say "I can't
believe I slept with him!? It didn't mean anything he's saying..." Regardless
if you have moral convictions regarding abstinence, there are a lot of things
to consider. Sex is overrated. My boyfriend and I have both had sex in
other relationships, which all ended badly, and we've been going out for almost
8 months, and we still haven't had sex. If we do get married, there will be
that experience for us to share. There are other ways to be close in a
relationship..."
"...who wants to get out of bed in the morning knowing that the person sleeping
next to them just wanted them for sex, and not who or what they are, but just
for physical recreation???? By seeing sex for just pleasure purposes, they are
minimizing the wonders of love because sex is an act of love. And when/if they
do get married, how do they think their spouse will feel knowing they think sex
is purely physical, and not emotional???"
Re: Sexual compatibility
"One thing I always mention about this is about that one Olympic runner dude
who now has AIDS due to a transfusion he had during a surgery he had. After he
found out he had AIDS, he and his wife cut off their sexual relations. They
have both said that their relationship has become stronger since then and that
they don't miss that aspect as much as they thought they would because their
commitment to each other has deepened and their love have grown even stronger
through their hardships."
EDITOR'S NOTE - This 'FAQ' has not referred to any religious based argument regarding virginity and sexuality. However, various people have commented on religious beliefs when discussing this issue. Below I have replied to questions/comments regarding virginity, sexuality, and Christianity.
'What right does a religious organization have to cheat people out of the right to explore, know, and enjoy their own bodies?'
I don't know exactly what organization you are referring to. However your claim that people are 'cheated' out of a right is not necessarily true. A belief system which would force people to abide by a rule, where the person had no free will or option to get out of that belief system or circumstance, would be wrong. Most belief systems have a set of guidelines, which are intended for the benefit of the individual and community. Those guidelines are voluntary to follow. However when one person's actions affect another, or lawmaker(s) feel that the law is beneficial to both individual and community, then the establishment of enforceable law is recommended.
Apparently you have a misunderstanding of the sexual view of man/woman that Christianity presents. Christianity and Biblical principles state that sexuality is a significant part of our natures. Christianity doesn't ignore sexuality at all. Actually as you know the belief system comments on sexuality quite often. :) And marriage is absolutely discussed, honored, and esteemed in the Bible.
'...made them male and female, and said, For this cause shall a man leave
father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they two shall be one
flesh? Wherefore they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath
joined together, let not man put asunder.' Matthew 19:4-6
'Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her
be as the loving hind and the pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all
times; and be thou ravished always with her love.' Proverbs 5:18-19
'Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing..' Proverbs 18:22
'So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife
loveth himself.' Ephesians 5:28
'Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the
wife unto the husband.' 1 Corinthians 7:3
'Marriage is honorable in all; and the bed undefiled...' Hebrews 13:4
How can you say Christianity 'denies that sexuality is an essential part of who and what we are?' By the numerous recommendations on sexual conduct alone contained in the Bible it is very clear that sexuality is definitely a major part of every human being, a very integral feature of the male/female relationship, and a gift to be used and given freely and wonderfully in the proper context. (ps - Check out the book in the Bible called Song of Solomon (aka Song of Songs) for some beautiful erotica!) :)
Long ago when the world was young and nobody understood The way a man and a woman could be in love the way they should He was sad he knew that something was missing but soon Adam would see A woman as he woke up from his sleep She was soft with the purest touch and her eyes said that she cared A friend to him and a friend to her and all the world to share And when they came together man and wife it was the perfect thing to do And then they said those words together, 'I love you.' That's the way that love began and that's the way that love was meant to be In the sadness or the laughter Into the darkness or the day The two of them became as one and love would guide the way Never leaving never thinking twice about a life for them apart They were joined together by the love inside their hearts
Well I know quite a few 'religious people' who choose not to engage in premarital sex for other reasons than just 'because God said so.' Take a look back to all the possible motivations presented in the previous sections of this 'FAQ'. And moral laws have their basis in the practical. God knows exactly those things which are necessary for a man and woman to fully enjoy a loving, intimate, committed, life-long relationship. He has graciously given us guidelines for our benefit, happiness, and protection. To make an analogy, a parent will tell his/her child not to touch the hot stove. Why doesn't the child touch it? Because of the parent's warning. But when he is old enough he will understand that the stove is hot and would hurt his hand. The practical behind the law. :)
Your boyfriend told you it would be alright
And all your friends are doin it in the dark of the night
They say you're gonna like the way it makes you feel
But how you gonna deal with the guilt and pain that's so real?
You see no end in sight. C'mon and make it right...
Somebody sold you a lie. Will you listen to this or will you be surprised?
And all your friends said it would be alright
As long as you believe in God you can do what you want on a Friday night
So you do what they call fun
But tell me do you feel empty when the morning comes
Somebody sold you a lie. Will you listen to this or will you be surprised?
You can't even believe the people that you idolize
'Cause somebody sold you a lie
In the heat of it all we compromise our faith
As the tension builds we break...
******'Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things...' Philippians 4:8
******
REFERENCES --------------------------Some excerpts and statistics have been taken from a few various sources:
FOOTNOTES --------------------------
The woman: a creation of mystery & delight # wojciech@osse.nrl.navy.mil # To search her soul on a moonlit night # ONLY A SURFER KNOWS THE FEELING # To view her gleaming eyes with passion # gO aGaInSt ThE fLoW ><> # To explore,question,& ponder after fashion # XOXO to Jasmine, Belle, & Ariel!#